Uncommon Sense

by meghan, 03-08-2006, 06:54 PM

UNCOMMON SENSE<br><br>It’s taken a while to learn the subtle difference<br>Between holding a hand and chaining a soul.<br><br>I’ve learned that love doesn’t mean leaning<br>And company doesn’t mean security.<br><br>I’ve learned that kisses aren’t contracts<br>And presents aren’t promises.<br><br>And I’ve begun to accept my defeats<br>With the gentleness of a woman, not the grief of a child.<br><br>I’ve learned to build all my roads on today<br>Because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans.<br><br>It’s taken a while to learn<br>That even sunshine burns if I get too much.<br><br>So, I plant my own garden and decorate my own soul<br>Instead of waiting for someone to bring me flowers.<br><br>And I’ve learned that I really can endure…<br>And that I really am strong…<br><br>And that I’m already good enough…<br>And I’m worthy of love…<br><br>And I learn and learn and learn.<br>

March 7

by meghan, 03-07-2006, 10:39 PM

All is well in the last week. I am scheduled to get an MRI this upcoming Saturday at 8am. I have done some fun things, one was going to one of my clients Art Openings, I got to see my brother and his girlfriend, and I got to have lunch with my dad and his wife. Good times. I cleaned out my room last week and organized my life. The love from Brazil is still with me. I'm trying to get my ticket soon because I plan on going in Mid April. Thanks to my Dad and Sally they are figuring out how to get Miles donated to me....and of course thanks to the people who are going to donate those miles. Without you this would not be possible. I'm going to receive some Reiki from Kristen Marie Wheale this afternoon and then I am going to my cancer cooking class this evening. I went to an amazing restorative yoga class last night. The class requires no effort at all, you use pillows and blankets to support your positions. It was very healing and meditative. I'll will be doing this every Monday night. That it for now. Please feel free to post responses on the message board. It doesn't have to respond to what I have written. Feel free to write what ever is on your mind. It is always fun to see what you have to say. Thanks.

March 2

by meghan, 03-02-2006, 09:41 PM

Being back home has been great. While in Brazil, as most of you know, I received an invisible surgery and one of the few rules I must follow is not to receive any alternative work as it may alter the work that has been done in Brazil. Well while I was in Brazil I asked JOG if I could receive Reiki from KM and his response was yes. So within the last few weeks I have had some amazing work from KM but my life seemed a little empty without the other 10 modalities that I was normally used to receiving. This was great because I was able to learn about something that is so easily forgotten. Stillness is a very special thing. A lot of healing takes place when there is stillness, it's just we normally never ever get the time to be still. Its taken me seven months to be OK with being still. We are so used to being in the future we really never get to enjoy the present. I have to be here, I have to be there, oh I could have said that another way, what should I have for dinner etc. I am very lucky to be able to experience this gift. Unfortunately for most people it takes tragedy to get here. After going to the beach this morning with Terra I parked my car and was about to get out to come home and decided to sit. I had the sun shining on my face and I leaned my seat slightly back. I watched the hustle and bustle of Laurel Village and that's when Terra came and looked me in the eyes with so much love and laid on my chest. She laid her head in the crevasse of my neck. She sighed, then went limp. So I decided to do the same. When is the last time you really appreciated something so much that time stood still, that nothing else really mattered? Fortunately I'm able to experience this on a regular basis. <br><br>I'm not worrying about what is to come because I'm right here. There have been many obstacles in the way of receiving western treatment since my trip back from Brazil. My medi-cal was randomly canceled because of a glitch in the system. Because of this my scheduled MRI and CT scan were canceled. Dr. Minor canceled his appointment with my although I wouldn't have been able to see him anyway because I never received my scans. I've tried to fax Medi-cal documents to my doctors but they got eaten up by my fax machine. I asked Divine Source/God to give me signs on my way back from Brazil, to show me if I should or should not do this experimental drug. Regardless things will work out exactly the way they need to. I'm just enjoying the process. I do know that I'm going back to Brazil this coming Mid April and this time I will spend approx. 3 weeks to a month. That's it for now. Sending love, compassion and gratitude. Thank you all for your support, prayers, love and energy. I couldn't do this without you.

Back to Reality Feb 26

by meghan, 02-27-2006, 02:17 AM

It has been a smooth transition from Abadania to San Francisco. Sally came and picked me up from the airport and took off work to spend the rest of the day with me. After 30 hours of travel time it was pure joy to see her face and of course Terra in her lap. We went on a hike near by and then spent the day in Half Moon Bay. We had an incredible day together and the weather held quite beautifully. Sally set up a pot luck for me on Thursday and invited all of my healers, Kristine Hicks, Kennedy, Wayne Ing, Kerstin Marie Wheale, Adine Michael's, Tracey Thompson, Stacey Thompson and Jill McCall. We had a great pot luck, great conversation and I showed everyone my pictures from Brazil and talked about what happened. Its great to be around people who support me unconditionally with all of their heart. Coming back I was hesitant in talking much more about my experiences because sometimes things are better left unsaid but my group of healers wouldn't have that and absorbed every bit of information with love, excitement and true belief. Thank you all for being a part of my life. <br><br>The only healing work I'm aloud until March 22nd is energy work by Kerstin Marie Wheale. With that said I have had a lot of free time to ease myself back into reality, meditate, be out in nature and love life. I'm not aloud to do any strenuous activity so I can't run for awhile but I can hike and take Terra places we've never been.<br><br>Kerstin Marie had a lot of visions that coincided with my trip.....parts I never talked about...of course. So it has been decided that she and Adine Micheals my other energy/shamanic healer, will be coming with me on my next trip to Brazil....which will be in Mid April. This time I will be staying for longer, three week to a month. <br><br>Thank you everyone for your continued support, love and understanding. Without you this wouldn't be possible. Love, compassion and gratitude.

The Invitation

by meghan, 02-19-2006, 09:00 PM

THE INVITATION<br><br>It doesn’t matter what you do for a living.<br><br>I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.<br>It doesn’t interest me how old you are.<br><br>I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for dreams, for the adventure of being alive.<br>It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring in your moon.<br><br>I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow,<br>if you have been opened by life’s betrayals or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain!<br><br>I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.<br><br>I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own;<br>if you can dance with wildness and let ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic,<br>or to remember the limitations of being a human.<br>It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true.<br><br>I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself;<br>if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul.<br><br>I want to know if you can be faithful and therefore trustworthy.<br><br>I want to know if you can see beauty even if it’s not pretty every day,<br>and if you can source your life from the divine`s presence.<br><br>I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of a lake and shout to the silver moon,<br>“Yes!”<br><br> <br><br>It doesn’t interest me where you live or how much money you have.<br><br>I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair, weary, bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done for the children.<br>It doesn’t interest me who you are, how you came to be here.<br><br>I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.<br>It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom you have studied.<br><br>I want to know what sustains you from the inside, when all else falls away.<br>I want to know if you can be alone with yourself; and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.<br> FROM THE BOOK, THE INVITATION<br><br>

Feb 14-19

by meghan, 02-19-2006, 08:59 PM

Wow, I can't believe its been five days and I haven't written a thing. Time has gone by so quickly. I must say my heart has opened up and things I never knew exsisted are flowing out and continue too. Bits and piece of myself on deeper levels are surfacing and I have really been called on my truth, faith, and intention. It all comes back to love and fear. I have been filled with nothing but love, compassion and graditude. <br><br>I went before the entity on Wednesday and asked him a few questions. 1. Should I take the experimental drug MDX-10, 2. Can I get CAT Scans and MRI before my fourty days. (fourty days from your surgery there are restrictions on diet, no sex, no alternative treatments or other treatments that may interfere with the entities work) (But the casa rules also say that you should continue on any medication etc. as they are not Medical doctors). 3. Should I stay longer. <br><br>He looked into my soul and said "you can stay longer". I left feeling as though he didn't answer my questions and I wanted him to tell me what to do....or at least say you must stay. I have learned this past week that we need to do this healing work on our own. The entity is here to heal and guide us not tell us what to do. When there is something that will harm you etc then he will tell you to something specific. So I sat and meditated on this. I came to a conclusion that I would stay one week longer unless there were major difficulty with the airline tickets. And there were. Because I was gifted miles the only way I could stay longer is if I bought a new ticket. So there was my answer. I would go home.<br><br>I went before him again. Now this entire week I've been wanting more surgery...can you believe that. There were other people who had questions and would go before the entity, the entity didn't even look at the questions and would just say surgery. Most of these people were disappointed and here I was wanting the surgery. "Just get it all out of me" I thought. I have now learned that this healing is on a much deeper, spiritual level. I am learning bits and pieces on spiritualism and have already bought a few books to learn more. It explains on a deeper level why I have cancer. I will write more about this later. <br><br>I went before the entity again and my list was as follows. 1. Cure me of all the cancer in my body. 2. Can I receive reiki treatments before my 40 days 3. I handed him pictures. He looked at the pictures (there were pictures of two people one of them was my reiki master....she just wanted to have her picture brought for kicks). Then he looked at the pictures and then at me with a big smile (first time he ever smiled at me) and he laughed. He said "yes you may receive reiki treatments from her" as he turned Maries picture towards me then he put it in his basket of people he works on. Then he said passi flora herbal presciption for the other photo. I couldn't believe it. He knew K. Marie was my energy worker. I was blown away and still a little disappointed that he didn't want me to get surgery.<br><br>Next time I went before the entity (mind you these entities all have different personalities, some more loving, others very stern. He can incorperate up to 60 different entities some were doctors other are saints etc.) it was revision for my surgery. I got my stitches out the night before. I went before him with four things. 1. Please continue my healing in the US. 2. Am I complete with my healing. 3. How many times must I come back. 4. Can I sit in the entity room. This entity was more on the stern side. I don't even think the questions got asked. As I stepped forward he was waving me away. I wasn't even before him for 2-3 seconds. He said something and the translator said you need to come back one more time. The times before I got to hold the entity's hand this time I got the cold shoulder but probably the most important information. Each time you go before the entity you then go and sit in the surgery room for 5-10 minutes. There are mediums in there and there are entitys that work on you. I began to cry. One more time. I know I will be coming back here for the rest of my life...but one more time for healing. I've already decided I'm coming back in mid April-May. I heard from others that they must not leave, must come back 4 time and one person must come back 10 times. This is why I cried.<br><br>My group has left and that was really sad. We have created a loving, open space and it has to come to an end. I have made long lasting friendships and have a deep love for everyone here. I have been inspired by a poem/writting. I am going to post it seperately to explain some of what I am feeling here. Its right along my plane and couldn't be better said.

Feb 14

by meghan, 02-14-2006, 08:59 PM

Well I've been looking back at some of my journals and realized I'm a day short in my writtings. So I'll catch you all up on what has happened...but I'm making it short because dinner is coming out and I'm HUNGRAY. <br>So yesterday I started my day with breakfast and then my New Zealand boys and Adra and I all decided to go up the road to this jewelry maker. His name is paulo and he is the cutest rasta/brazilian man full of light, energy and happiness. His smile would blow you way. He works with metals and makes the most beautiful jewerly. And when we bought something he made each of us a specail ring. We cruised around the town and all had smoothings at a little place called frutties. We went back to the pausada and I rested. I went latter for a crystal bed and before had I was invited to the waterfall. Just so you know there is a sacred waterfall here but you need permission from the entity in order to go. But the entities want us to be safe so we must go with someone. So if you are invited by someone who has permission you can go. Also men and women must go seperately. Anyway I was invited and it was amazing. After that I was energized, I ate, read and went to bed. <br>Today is valentines day and I got two cards and a present from my friends. At first I felt bad that I had thought ahead but that gets me know where. First the givers like to give and what you to be happy and its always a gift to receive. I let it go right away. We started our day with going to the waterfall. Our entire group went because our group leaders asked permission last week. Once again it was amazing. Its is a blast of energy and its so powerful it leaves you dizzy. Its not that big..maybe 6 ft high and 12-20 inches wide. I meditated at the casa and had another crystal bed. And lucky me I got asked again to go to the waterfall. Two times in one day. So cleansing, pure and healing. No photos etc are aloud so it will just be a great memory. I'm off to dinner. I'm not going to reread what I wrote so I hope I make sense. Love. Meghan.

Thanks You For Your Thoughts

by meghan, 02-13-2006, 04:41 PM

Thanks to everyone who have posted responses on the website. It fills my heart with love to know you are all here with me. Thank You.

Feb 13

by meghan, 02-13-2006, 04:34 PM

So yesterday my energy was much better but I still felt like couldn't walk to the casa and back. I took a taxi to a 10am prayer service. They really shouldn't call it a prayer service because it leads one to believe that there would be lots of Hail Mary's etc. This service is for us to be able to give back to the entities that have been giving to us...but in english. There were some prayers read, buddist, catholic but very few. It was mostly filled with poems and songs that were written by inspired individuals. One woman who wrote a book about the casa, who is a powerful medium here at the casa and who has been a shamanic healer for over 20 years sang an American Indian song in native tongue while playing her drum. I could go on about how many people got up and shared their experiences in different ways. I couldn't share anything because I was crying the entire time. I went to a similar service last week that I thought was beautiful but this week I was so effected by the love, peace, forgiveness and graditude that my heart just poured itself out. <br><br>We have all tumbled through life some way or another and we can see it as difficult or beautiful. Think of a beach with the stones and the shells on shore...they have been tubbled, kicked, abandoned, stepped on etc but they are the most beautiful gems. That is one way to some of my experience into words. I am in a spiritual hospital....I see children and adults in wheelchairs, bald men and women that have been kicked around by chemotherapy, people who can't control their movements (MS, Parkisons), and much more. But these people are happier and more connected then anyone or any group of people I've ever seen. <br><br>I forgot to mention the day I was in line to see John of God I witnessed a physical surgery. John came out onto the front stage, sat an older man down. I stood up on the bench to see. He was then given a scalpel and scraped each eye ball about fifteen times. The man never blinked, never said one word. John then took the point of the scalpel and scraped into the corners of his eyes. Both times he removed residue from the scalpel. Our group leader Bob Dinga got a physical surgery and his was getting a pair of scissors shoved up his nose. The length of the scissors were about 7 inches. No pain during and or now. In fact he was smiling the entire time he was on stage. There is spiritual anasthesia used on the phyical and invisible surgeries so you don't feel the pain. Its hard to believe but I've seen it with my own eyes. <br><br>Enough of the freakiness. I spent most of my time at the casa yesterday. My friend Mondana, who is a surgeon in England, and I went to a service held at 8pm. Towards the end of the service I felt a female presence and she was working on my head. After the service Mondana turned, looked at me and said did you feel her.....I was shocked. Of all people in our group Mondana has felt the least and has been the most skeptical...not shit she's a surgeon. This trip has been nothing but amazing. My spirit, soul and mind have opened more and more everyday that I am here. Its not about the outcome its all about the process. <!--emo&:D--><img src='http://meghanmckenna.com/mb/style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif' border='0' valign='absmiddle' alt='biggrin.gif'><!--endemo-->

Feb 11

by meghan, 02-11-2006, 07:29 PM

Sorry I haven't written in a while. Two nights ago my New Zealand friends, Greg and Les, took me and my other friend Adra out to dinner and dessert. We had great food and great conversation. We didn't get back until 9pm so I went to bed early to prepare for my invisable surgery then next morning.<br><br>Feb 10 we had breakfast and walked down to the casa. The sunrise was incredible one I will remember. Adra and Greg already had their surgery on Wednesday and Les is not getting one. So they got up early to go in the current room to support my surgery. As the surgery line was called we entered the current room. I saw all my friends supporting me....they all had their eyes closed. I went though the current room, then the entity room, then the second current room and then the surgery room. We all took a seat and once everyone got in their we were asked to close our eyes. I felt John of God's presence enter the room, or I should say the entity that was in John. A woman began to cry. We were asked to put our hand over the injured area and if there was more than one area to place our hand over our heart. I felt enormous amounts of energy coming thru my hand and towards the end I felt heat entering thru my head on the right side. It almost felt as if someone was touching it but not quite. It last about 10-20 minute...I couldn't tell. Once it was over we were asked to get up slowly and leave out the door. We were then given instruction in english about how to treat this like a real surgery etc, to sleep for the next 24 hour or lay in bed, not to walk to the casa for the next four day etc, to get our herbs and so on. I got my herb and got in a taxi with our group leader Diana. I went straight into my room and laid down. I felt trobbing dull pain over the four place on my head and over one area in my chest. Occationally I felt pangs of pain in my breast. I fell asleep right away and the only time I woke is when someone brought me food. I slept from 10am to 11am this morning. I feel as though I've been through something major and so I don't feel like doing much but laying down. Ive been just hanging around the pausada eating, reading and watching movies. So far thats been my experience. Everything has been interesting and good. It is nothing I expected but I didn't really go into it with expectation. I've met incredible people and have been inspired on many levels. This is definately a place I will come back too. The energy here is unlike any other. Much love, compassion and graditude. Meghan